Yesterday, I learned to enjoy solitude.
My Tuesday schedule is pretty simple: I have classes from 2-3 and then from 6-9. So I have plenty of time during the day to do whatever I need to!
So my day started with some breakfast in the dining hall (sitting alone), I often eat alone here, so it didn’t seem that strange. Then, I took a little excursion into a neighboring town to look around at the shops and such. I went to a Goodwill and bought a baby blue cashmere sweater for $20, and walked around a few other stores. I went into a super cute antique store and searched around for a while, and I gotta say this was one of the best antique stores I’ve ever been into. I bought a silver Claddagh ring and some old photographs. I stopped at a local breakfast-y cafe called “Toast” and got an iced mocha for the road. I headed over to class alone, sat through class generally alone, walked home alone, ate dinner alone, and headed to my other class alone. I didn’t do any of this intentionally, either. I guess some days for me are “alone” days and other days I’m just a social butterfly.
But, I like being alone. A lot. Maybe a bit too much? My last year of high school was spent alone during the day, and then I would head to work. I didn’t spend my times constantly with any one person or eating lunch at school with anyone. It was alarming at first to get used to sitting alone while doing everything, but I really grew to appreciate being alone. And now, if I’ve been too social for the day, I know when to call it quits and spend some time by myself.
Loneliness was a journey for me, and a weird one at that. But now I am able to spend time on myself and loving myself. And I don’t feel lonely when I’m alone. I just feel alone. That is something that a lot of people can never come to terms with, so I’m glad I’ve learned it this early.